Like Water For Chocolate

Many years ago, I read this book. It is a love story of a life long love between Pedro and Tita, set in Mexico. Each chapter begins with a recipe and as Tita cooks it, the food takes on her mood. Like if she is weeping when cooking because her heart is breaking for Pedro, when the guests eat the food, they all start crying inconsolably too!! I loved that book when I read it and am going to go and buy 5 copies tomorrow to give to the ladies who are coming to the Karma Pies Chocolate Lovers Morning!


So, today, at 2:30 am, while I was making Karma Pies first batch of chocolates, dark chocolate, some plain and some with walnut centers, I was weeping. Just weeping for possibilities, choices, and also for gratitude for the abundance in my life.

I wonder if the people who eat them tomorrow will also weep like the people who ate Tita's desserts?!!

Love,
Jhilmil

Editorial Reviews (from Amazon)

From Publishers Weekly
Each chapter of screenwriter Esquivel's utterly charming interpretation of life in turn-of-the-century Mexico begins with a recipe--not surprisingly, since so much of the action of this exquisite first novel (a bestseller in Mexico) centers around the kitchen, the heart and soul of a traditional Mexican family. The youngest daughter of a well-born rancher, Tita has always known her destiny: to remain single and care for her aging mother. When she falls in love, her mother quickly scotches the liaison and tyrannically dictates that Tita's sister Rosaura must marry the luckless suitor, Pedro, in her place. But Tita has one weapon left--her cooking. Esquivel mischievously appropriates the techniques of magical realism to make Tita's contact with food sensual, instinctual and often explosive. Forced to make the cake for her sister's wedding, Tita pours her emotions into the task; each guest who samples a piece bursts into tears. Esquivel does a splendid job of describing the frustration, love and hope expressed through the most domestic and feminine of arts, family cooking, suggesting by implication the limited options available to Mexican women of this period. Tita's unrequited love for Pedro survives the Mexican Revolution the births of Rosaura and Pedro's children, even a proposal of marriage from an eligible doctor. In a poignant conclusion, Tita manages to break the bonds of tradition, if not for herself, then for future generations.
Copyright 1992 Reed Business Information, Inc. --This text refers to the Hardcover edition.

Positive People and Money...

I know this person, Ms. X. She has come into my life recently. And though she calls herself a yogini, she is so money minded and petty... What is that all about I wonder? How can you be so mean, so negative, and so obsessed with money and on the other hand, talk about empowerment, the power of positive thought and transformation?

I don't get it. But maybe that is just me. Maybe that is her work persona, what she would like people to believe and she is actually petty, insecure, and mean within.


Oh well, blogged it out, and got it off my chest! I'll write something more interesting in a bit.

Love,
Jhilmil

To Live in Fear...

I wonder how many people live like I am living now. To be scared that anything they say will be the trigger needed for their family to lock them up. 2 years ago, when I was locked up in Vimhans, a psychiatric facility and worse than a mental asylum for those who do not know, I saw many women sent to Vimhans as a punishment for not being "good wives". There was an older woman there, Radhika, whose husband would just send her there every year for months on end. Money was obviously not a problem for them, and this woman was so gentle, so sad, and so bewildered at being locked up for months on end. The doctors would come and ask me every day, "do you feel guilty yet?" And though initially, I used to say No, later I started saying Yes, just hoping that maybe if I could fool the doctors into thinking I was a "surrendered wife", they would let me go home.

For 2 years, I have been grateful for life's simple pleasures. A shower in a bathroom I can lock (even the bathrooms there are not private...). A cup of tea brewed my way on my pretty balcony overlooking an old neem tree. A morning hug from Liam every morning as if he has not seen me for years!!

But now I question, all this at what cost? At the cost of truly being free? Because I am constantly evaluating the words that come out from my mouth. There is a constant mental dialogue in my head and I am scared of speaking because I am terrified of being locked up.

What do you think? Is it good to live in fear? Is it worth it for the sake of making your family happy to not be true to yourself? And should I keep putting up with being put down just because I have bipolar disorder and others don't? I don't put people down if they have diabetes or high blood pressure. Why should people feel they can put me down just because I am bipolar???

Love,
Jhilmil

PS: Shopping for a better psychologist and psychiatrist I can trust, hate Dr Nagpal at Vimhans... though my husband loves him! Should we see psychiatrists for us or for our families???

Baking is like Meditation

3 am in the Karma Kitchen...

Take flour out, take out zucchini, start grating, start beating eggs...all done so mindfully and consciously it turns into meditation.

What is meditation? Not the mindless chanting of some mantras or staring fixedly at a point while your mind wanders in all different directions. Meditation is being so engrossed in the activity that you block everything else out... like I heard the Dalai Lama say at a talk I was fortunate enough to attend. How do you eat an orange and turn it into meditation? When you are peeling the orange, just think about that action. As you eat each slice, just think about the taste, the texture and how the orange feels in your mouth. Don't let your mind wander. And that is meditation!

So, fellow travelers on this searching journey, meditate. It is so good for you! And it does not have to be a spiritual or religious meditation which most people try. When you run, just run. When you eat, just eat. And when you play, just play.

Simple? Maybe not... but with practice you'll love it.

In the zone. Focused. Sure. Everything else in your life will start seeming so easy...

Love,
Jhilmil


PS: Check out this interesting yoga class: baking like meditation!
http://images.google.com/imgres?imgurl=http://balanceyogalounge.com/wp-content/uploads/2009/09/bread-baking-9.jpg&imgrefurl=http://balanceyogalounge.com/blog/&usg=__lM2foJpwyI8GnDcXfnVzzXwupR0=&h=1227&w=924&sz=404&hl=en&start=3&sig2=5GLtuA0ZvXHzxjGINQLQkA&um=1&tbnid=rLRt16HJREgl4M:&tbnh=150&tbnw=113&prev=/images%3Fq%3Dbaking%2Blike%2Bmeditation%26hl%3Den%26client%3Dsafari%26rls%3Den-us%26um%3D1&ei=8a-6SqvKK4aHkQWtg934BQ

September 7, 2009 · Filed Under Living Yoga

Bread baking…a quiet meditation

September 4, 2009 · Filed Under Living Yoga · Comment

Back again this fall- our popular breadbaking as meditation workshop.

Noodle Zoo will share their kitchen Zen Sept 28 at 7pm. The workshop will begin with hands on mixing and kneading of dough and then proceed to relaxing yoga stretches and meditation while the loaves rise. After baking, we will break bread together and spend time reflecting on the transformative process of creating bread and the possible parallels to life itself.
Baking not only demands concentration and presence but also offers a bit of sanctuary. The process of making bread creates a shift in awareness, becoming absorbed- not thinking of yesterday or tomorrow- but giving your attention to the bread, focusing on the dough in your hands.

call Sandy 515-210-8138 or email sandy@balanceyogalounge.com
(limited to 8 participants)

Our Goddess Group Coffee Morning!

10 am, Cafe Turtle.

Tania and Lora and I had arranged to meet... What a delightful morning it was! Tania, so spiritual and so conscious of the goddess and the shakti within, Lora so completely unaware, and me in between the two. Over coffees and my drink (Fountain of Youth!! a combo of fresh pineapple juice and coconut water), we whiled two hours away.

Talking about magic, crystals, beauty, men, food... all the stuff women like to share and chat about and which men are clueless about, we revelled in our Goddess Group morning.

Have set up to meet again next Wednesday, and we've all written Goddess Group in our planners!! Can't wait, look out world, the power of three Goddesses is being unleashed!!!

Love,
Jhilmil

Feeling trapped...

I am slightly manic. Okay, so I know that. I love the deliciousness of mania. I love the energy and the boundless enthusiasm, the flavours and smells that seem more enhanced, the colours of life.

But why is it that my family hates it? Why do they keep threatening to "take me to the doctor"... concern is one thing. But I am being careful and watchful. A good mother and wife and entrepreneur. Why do they only want to "take me to the doctor" when I am slightly manic? Why not when I feel quiet and suicidal??

Families the world over use hospitals and doctors like an invisible sword hanging over people like me. And we are so terrified of being locked up again that we bow under and bite our words and hide our delight at being manic.

I think it is a crime. To live constantly looking over our shoulders, to not be ourselves because husband and watchman does not approve...

What do you think?? Write in with your thoughts, at least I'll feel I'm not alone.

Love,
Jhilmil