Excessive Force... from the about.com blog

I was forcibly locked up for 46 days in New Delhi, India, by my parents and husband for being a little abusive in a stressful situation. 10 policemen came and dragged me to a mental facility. It was the single most traumatic and devastating period of my life and I live now in fear of being locked up again. To be locked up, abused, violated and punished by people you love and trust is the biggest form of betrayal. I don't care what they were thought, and what advice they were given by the medical fraternity. I still have nightmares and fears of being locked up again, and I have to live with that in my bipolar head...

I hope this makes some families consider their actions when they feel they are acting in the best interest of their bipolar disordered loved ones. What we need most is love and understanding. Lack of that makes us go more crazy...

Love,
Jhilmil

Read what is on the Bipolar Disorder blog today from about.com

Excessive Force?
Tuesday November 24, 2009
That's what the family of Michael J. Gibson is saying after a San Francisco Bay Area Rapid Transit (BART) officer shoved him into a window of a train station, breaking the glass and injuring both. According to The Raw Story, Gibson has been charge with "felony battery of a police officer, obstructing and resisting an officer, disorderly conduct and public intoxication." Gibson's sister, however, says the officer was way out of line, and that her brother suffers from "bipolar disorder and schizophrenia."
The incident was caught by a passenger with a cell phone and the video posted on YouTube, where it gained widespread attention. (Warning: there is a lot of foul language in the video.)

It is plain from the video that Gibson was out of line, and that the officer could not have determined the man was mentally ill. Regardless, it appears to me that there was absolutely no reason for the officer to slam Gibson into the glass. And would the officer have treated Gibson differently if he had known about the man's mental illness? What do you think?
~Marcia

Dear Diary...

So, as I decide I feel like writing today, there are no burning issues to discuss. It's just a simple peace, a happy existence, and a feeling of pure love... is this why comedians and writers stay angry and full of angst so they can create?? Maybe. But I feel, at this time of peace, I am the most productive I have ever been. Just like what Goenka ji of Vipassana or Master Choa Kok Sui say... if you meditate, you become much more productive and people are just left gaping...

So, fellow lovers, meditators, yogis, and friends, what do you think? Are you truly living, laughing, loving? If not, why do you wait? Start living in the moment, meditate, look inward, become a witness, and live in bliss! And that is The Secret.

Love,
Jhilmil

An amazing letter to me from the author of the DaVinci Method

Dear Jhilmil,

You are amazing. Many do not understand your bipolar nature; but
you can rest assured ...

The bipolar experience is no more than this:
A heroic soul born inhumanely sensitive,
desperately in need of true connection.

To you ... a touch is a blow, a misfortune is a tragedy,
a joy is an ecstasy, a friend is a lover, a daydream is a
premonition, strictness is suffocation, and completion is death.

Add to your brutally sensitive soul the overwhelming need to
heal, create, and transform -- so that without the outpouring
of honesty, the creating of music or poetry or something of
meaning your very breath is cut off ...

You must create, must pour out your entire being in each and
every encounter. By some strange, unknown, inward urgency you do
not feel truly alive unless you are risking everything through
your divine expression.

Thank you for having the courage to create ... to transform ...
to be ... in a way other souls don't.

For without your courage and your light
the world would grow listless and dull
and the rest of us who are like you
would not have your courageous acts
to inspire our own.

Rock on,
Garret LoPorto
Author of The DaVinci Method
www.DaVinciMethod.com
Twitter: twitter.com/garretloporto

The above message by Garret LoPorto was inspired by Pearl
Buck 's poetry.


Media for your Mind, Inc.
199 Sudbury Road
Suite 2B
Concord, MA 01742

Intimacy, marriages and expectations

Is it right to stay in a marriage just for the kids when all intimacy is gone?? This is the question I grapple with tonight as I have had a fun day with my stuff, done healing for a small child with a disability, and then been Mommy to my kids. At 8 pm, my husband walks in, much later than normal, with not a single call or explanation. He serves himself dinner and then takes it to the TV room. I ask him to sit with me but he wants to "relax'... I keep doing my work then...

What does all this mean? No intimacy, no sex, no cuddles, no talking... Is this what I have in store for me for the next 40 years? Looks pretty bleak to me.

Maybe this is what Kahlil Gibran meant when he talks of marriage?

Help me to figure this one out!

Love,
Jhilmil

On Marriage
Kahlil Gibran

You were born together, and together you shall be forevermore.
You shall be together when the white wings of death scatter your days.
Ay, you shall be together even in the silent memory of God.
But let there be spaces in your togetherness,
And let the winds of the heavens dance between you.


Love one another, but make not a bond of love:
Let it rather be a moving sea between the shores of your souls.
Fill each other's cup but drink not from one cup.
Give one another of your bread but eat not from the same loaf
Sing and dance together and be joyous, but let each one of you be alone,
Even as the strings of a lute are alone though they quiver with the same music.


Give your hearts, but not into each other's keeping.
For only the hand of Life can contain your hearts.
And stand together yet not too near together:
For the pillars of the temple stand apart,
And the oak tree and the cypress grow not in each other's shadow.